Rudolph revisited

First of all... Yes, I did take the time to paste a Santa hat on the picture to the right - in "Paint," no less. You're welcome. Now...

Forget the condescending "all-his-songs-sound-the-same" h8ers. Jack Johnson (new album, "Sleep Through the Static," coming out in February... Oh boy!) is, in fact, The Man. For proof to that end, check out the lyrics to his cover of "Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Reindeer" from a few years back. His original additions to the traditional song are in italics at the end:

Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Reindeer,
Had a very shiny nose.
And if you ever saw it,
You might even say it glows.
All of the other reindeer,
Used to laugh and call him names.
They never let poor Rudolph,
Join in any reindeer games.
Then one foggy Christmas Eve,
Santa, he came to say,
"Rudolph, with your nose so bright,
Won't you guide my sleigh tonight?"
Then how the reindeers loved him,
As they shouted out with glee,
"Rudolph, the red-nosed reindeer,
You'll go down in history!"
But Rudolph, he didn't go for that.
He said, "I see through your silly games."
How could you look me in the face,
When only yesterday you called me names?
Well, all of the other reindeers man,
Well they sure did feel ashamed.
"Rudolph, you know we're sorry.
We're truly gonna try to change."

Good stuff, right? You can listen to the track on YouTube here, posted - I think - by a German-speaker. That looks like German to me, anyways, I dunno.

Merry Christmas, everyone/anyone who reads this!

A really great idea.

During my freshman year at Iona College, blessed with relatively simple classes and not yet involved with the Ionian, I played basketball 3 or 4 times a week. Less often, but still on a semi-regular basis, I'd run on the treadmill conveniently located in the basement of my dorm.

In doing these things, I effectively avoided the dreaded freshman 15 - and actually dropped a few pounds from move-in day in late August to the last day of finals in May.

The subsequent year-and-a-half, however, have been... a little different, and I've decided that this winter break is the time for me to start getting back into shape - or something vaguely resembling it, anyways.

Faced with this task, and observing lately how my sister now frequents a local gym, I've been reminded of an idea that I've had for quite some time. And it needed to be unleashed into the blogosphere, so here it is.

Remember the Discovery Zone? You probably do. I don't think anyone could have forgotten the ridiculously catchy jingle from their old commercials, at the very least. But back in the day, DZ was - to state it plainly - the best place ever. Every moment spent in DZ's hulking maze of tunnels, slides, nets, ball pits, moonwalks, etc., was a moment of pure, unfiltered joy.

My parents took some home video of one birthday party I had at DZ. And aside from the obligatory footage of me blowing out the candles on my cake, there's a brief glimpse of my friends and I breathlessly darting back and forth throughout the aforementioned maze, huge grins plastered on our faces the whole time. Watching, you realize that - not only were we having a blast - we were getting a pretty good workout, too.

Question: Would that kind of a workout still be that fun, post-childhood? My answer: Yes. And my idea that logically follows: Someone needs to open up something like the old Discovery Zones - but this time, for adults.

No, time passed at a "DZ4A" (as I'd call it, assuming copyright/trademark legality) wouldn't provide the structured kind of exercise possible at a more traditional health club. But for those of us not too concerned with targeting specific muscles using specialized machines and things of that nature, it would be - to state it plainly - the best place ever.